Thursday, February 01, 2007

Doing Something for Myself

I was genuinely surprised this morning when hubby rolled over in bed and announced that it was the 1st of February today.

Yikes!! Did January just happen? Where is the year running to? I cannot believe that we are already the first month of the New Year down.

Ever noticed that the older you get the quicker time seems to whiz by? As a child/teenager the time couldn’t go quick enough. I don’t know how many times my parents had to listen to my cries of ‘I’m soooooo bored’. Nowadays – in this our fast paced world of iPods, computers, microwaves, dishwashers, memory sticks, PDA’s, blackberries and blogs- I find that I just don’t seem to have the time to be bored. In fact, I just don’t seem to have the time to be anything! But on closer inspection – what exactly am I doing with my time? Shall I be brutally honest? Not much.

Sure I do what every body else does, I try to juggle the work-life balance – I sleep, wake up, go to work, come back home, cook (if I’m in the mood), veg out in front of the TV or PC for a couple of hours or curl up with a good book/glossy mag, be a mom, be a wife, have a shower, go to bed… and the cycle continues. Sometimes there might be a blip to the routine in the form of a visitor or an unexpected phone call from a long lost friend and that’s about it. Exciting stuff, huh?

I remember when I was packing my bags to move over to England seven years ago (that long??? Feels like yesterday) I was full of drive, motivation, oomph! Oh, the things I was going to do, the heights I was going to reach, the accomplishments I was going to achieve. Yeah. Right.

People say Count Your Blessings, Other People are Worse off than You, One Day, yada yada yada. I do count my blessings but, BUT- I find myself thinking - I want MORE, is this such a bad thing? I don’t mean more in financial terms, although that would be nice, I mean more in terms of achieving SOMETHING, filling up this void of unfulfilment, making my life count for something. I think the bottom line is – DOING SOMETHING FOR MYSELF. There. I’ve said it. I want to do something for myself. Not for hubby, or children, or family, or country but SOMETHING FOR MYSELF. Feels good saying that.

But here’s the tricky part: What do I REALLY want for myself?

I shall sit back and reflect upon this. I feel a lengthy list coming on.

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19 Comments:

Blogger SongReach said...

in response to this post, read my last post when you have a chance. Keep reaching, you'll get there!

7:35 pm  
Blogger Fred said...

"I shall sit back and reflect upon this."

H'm. More sitting back? Start doing something, anything. My two cents. ;-)

9:02 pm  
Blogger Pilgrimage to Self said...

@Fred: Ouch! That was below the belt. But you're right dawggonnit!! :)

10:05 pm  
Blogger Pilgrimage to Self said...

@Songreach: I'm making my way to your blog now...

10:06 pm  
Blogger Fred said...

PTS: what belt? :-)

Heheh... sorry, can't resist today.

10:07 pm  
Blogger Omara said...

Hello... I'm new to blog land and I'm loving your blog. I also love the poetry on 'The Write Words'. I wrote a poem on my blog titled "i've disappeared", have a read. I don't know if it's because Jan has ended and the year is well underway, but almost everyone I know and on the blogs I visit, is asking "who am i?" No answers from me here, just to let you know "I know how you feel"

11:50 pm  
Blogger laspapi said...

Fred said, "Start doing something, anything".

Let's not mistake motion for direction.

5:02 am  
Blogger Fred said...

Touche, laspapi. However, by age 37, if you don't have direction, why bother moving?

1:39 pm  
Blogger Shola said...

hmnn, i really feel you.
days into months, months into years, years into a lifetime.
time does fly!and we someday will have to give an account of how its been spent.

thanks for your comment on my blog.

2:52 pm  
Blogger Kemi said...

Hello, referred to your blog in my most recent post. I am having one of those moments and also get tired with being told that there are those who are not as lucky as I am etc. So I set goals for 2007 and trying ever so slowly to get there. Any movement is good as long as it's not backwards.

4:01 pm  
Blogger Ore said...

I remember the meme about describing your dream life. That was so beautiful. I thought perhaps that's what you wanted to do and it sounds like you had already started taking steps towards actualizing it.

Sometimes we are doing more than we actually realise.

5:51 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hmmm very nice.A woman's life...we tend to live so much for others. It's really necessary sometimes to take stock and do something for ourselves.
May God guide you in your endeavours.

4:48 am  
Blogger In my head and around me said...

You are always so on point, it's scary!

6:16 pm  
Blogger laspapi said...

Point noted, Fred. However, the Ibos have an adage-

"Whenever you rise up is your morning."

Time is relative.

4:29 am  
Blogger Toks- Boy said...

PTS- with kid(s) one can sometimes get lost in their lives and it is always a struggle to do something for yourself. However the very fact that you are raising this means that in your subconscious something is stearting to germinate. Time to bring it to the fore

I recall a saying that the minute you say that you want to learn something a teacher will appear.

9:11 am  
Blogger Uzo said...

Ah. The need for more and not knowing what more is. Its scary that a lot of people ask this question especially people older than i am. Makes me wonder

12:15 pm  
Blogger Fred said...

laspapi, I know, I'm an Ibo man myself. I've always felt that saying was just an excuse to be lazy. Didn't Okonkwo use it extensively? :-)

3:06 am  
Blogger uknaija said...

Hey- you know what- don't beat up yourself- you've achieved a whole lot- your relationship, your kid/s (is there a word between singular and plural), this blog- YES THIS BLOG- I could go on. I know it's probably not what you want to hear now but you know what sometimes I can't help thinking that all that self-fulfilment stuff is overrated...and yes, I think there's something about January that has us all reflecting

12:22 pm  
Blogger lolaojiks said...

"achieving SOMETHING, filling up this void of unfulfilment, making my life count for something. I think the bottom line is – DOING SOMETHING FOR MYSELF. "


I really enjoy your blog and find it quite enlightening but my view/experience with self fulfillment is that it is more often achieved from doing something for someone else rather than from doing something for yourself.

11:58 pm  

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