OMG! It’s finally hit me. I am expecting a baby and in the next 8 weeks I will be giving birth to my 2nd child!! Then from henceforth, I will forever be known as ‘PTS, 37, mother of two’. Arrrggghhh!!!
I’ve blogged in the past about how I feel slightly disconnected from this pregnancy – work + home+ mummy duties making it difficult to give my full attention to it – and so I have thought about it in a slightly detached way, almost like the whole experience were happening to someone else. But sitting on my bed today looking through the bag full of stuff I just purchased to tide me over the initial pre and post-birth period (yes, you will be proud of me. After my dream
the other night, I ran out and bought everything from nipple shields to a baby rattle) the penny dropped. This. Is. Real. I. AM. Having. A. Baby. In eight weeks time I am going to be smelling of baby sick, going slightly deranged from lack of sleep and nursing sore nipples! Oooh, I feel faint. I’m going to have to lie down for a minute to recover…
What happened to that footloose fancy free 18 year old I used to be? I look at myself in the mirror and I don’t feel a day past 18. Okay make that 21. The point is I FEEL YOUNG. Incredibly so. And sometimes as I live my life I feel like I am playing pretend – dressing up, going to work, earning a living, paying a mortgage, y’know, grown up stuff – but there are always little things lurking out there to remind me that I am not playing pretend and indeed, I am getting on in years. Take the other day for example when my husband mentioned something about his 17 -year- old employee. I was genuinely startled to realise that she is 20 years younger than me. And I thought to myself ‘little old me, 20 years older than somebody’. It was a sobering thought, I can tell you that.
But then your friends stab you in the back and start growing older as well which serves as a harsh reminder that you are too. For instance, I was in London two weeks ago to attend a friends 40th birthday party. Can you imagine, I actually have a close friend who is FORTY YEARS OLD. It’s enough to make me weep.
So you think you are not getting old? Well, here’s my little list to
remind you that you are.
You know you are getting old when ….
1. You begin to eye up anti-wrinkle cream with great interest.
2. You start turning into your mother.
3. You find yourself starting your sentences with ‘In my day…’
4. You can exclaim ‘Gosh you’ve grown. The last time I saw you you were this high…’ (didn’t you just hate being told that when you were little?)
5. You start taking life altering decisions.
6. You scan your TV channels looking for the news.
7. You actually ENJOY watching the news.
8. You skip all the hot trendy ‘in-season’ fashions for more ‘timeless and classic’ stuff.
9. You remember the first time you watched Michael Jackson’s Thriller.
10. You remember
And finally you know you are definitely getting old when you wake up at 4 O’clock in the morning to blog about it!
Labels: Growing older, Pregnancy