Thursday, November 30, 2006

Proving myself Nigerian

I generally try to steer clear of race, religion and politics on my blog but this particular issue has been bugging me for a while.

In the UK, according to their equal opportunity and ethnicity forms, I am known as Mixed Race (sometimes I have the option of White and Black African), in Nigeria I am commonly and wrongly referred to as being half caste, in the slave days I would have been known as a mulatto, and I have even been asked what breed I am. Excuse me?

I, on the other hand, have always referred to myself as being Mixed. And sometimes, when I do not see an appropriate category on a form in which to place myself, I make up my own – Afro-European.

As nature would have it though, I have taken most of my physical features from my mother (who is the white – oops is that PC? or the Caucasian parent) – I am pale skinned, becoming even more so now that it’s winter and there is no sunshine in sight to tan me golden, I’ve got long straight hair (for which I was always the envy of my friends as I have never had to use any sort of straightening products), and all my life I have always been asked if I was Indian, Chinese or Hawaiian. When I was six months old and in Germany, my mum was congratulated on being brave and compassionate enough to have adopted a Vietnamese orphan!!

Sometimes looking the way I do has been an advantage. For instance, when I was in university and we had to queue up either to pay for hostel accommodation or at the bursary to pay the tuition fees, nine times out of ten I would be called from the back of the queue to the front to pay before anyone else. It was like the general thought amongst the university officials was that I couldn’t cope with standing in the heat so it was best to attend to me first – I was presumed to be an Aje-butter because of the way I looked. Did I put them right and behave all noble and wait my turn patiently in the sun for four hours? Hell no! (LOL).

At other times, it’s been a disadvantage. Most traders and market sellers always tried to rip me off. I was always a beacon in the dark for the area boys on the beach who just assumed I was loaded with ‘dolla’s’ and so hung around me like flies on shit – and were sometimes quite aggressive as well. But coming to think about it Area Boy and Aggression kind of go hand in hand. And last year, I was almost refused renewal of my Nigerian passport at the immigration office in Enugu because the immigration officer didn’t believe that I was Nigerian. As for the original passport that needed renewing? Well, he thought I had greased a few palms to get it in the first place, naturally. My husband, quickly sensing that I was on the verge of telling the officer where he could stick his non-advantageous green Nigerian passport, stepped in in the nick of time and soothed things over before I had a chance to explode and thus seriously jeopardizing my chances of renewing my passport EVER. I did get the passport renewed in the end but not before we were fleeced of a few thousand Naira.

And what always made me laugh was the little children who would run after me in the markets yelling ‘shpree- shpree- sphree’ through their noses in their imitation of a foreign accent I guess.

But the focus of this post is to do with my fellow Nigerians and their reactions towards me.

Whenever I find myself at a Nigerian gathering (for example a general meeting of Nigerians in Diaspora or at a Naija only party) I always notice a slight puzzled look fleet across the faces around me as they try and figure out what exactly I am doing amongst them. Then one person invariably plucks up the courage and asks ‘Are you Nigerian?’ and even when I respond that I am, I can still see the doubt and this is when I find myself adapting my language. I either start to intersperse my sentences with pidgin English, or I casually drop in some conk ‘you-will-only-know-these-words-if-you-are-Nigerian’ speak into my conversation. Only then do I see them visibly relax. Then the final question comes ‘But you are not full Nigerian, are you?’

The scene described above has played itself out many times over the years and I sometimes despair that I have to ‘prove’ myself Nigerian to my fellow country people. It’s almost as though because I have white blood flowing through my veins I cannot be considered a thorough bred Nigerian in spite of the fact that I was born and raised there. I lived there for 30 years for chrissakes, how much more Nigerian could I possibly be?

I adore African/Nigerian arts and crafts so every room, flat or house I have lived in has always been decorated with a strong African theme – leather poufs from the North, terracotta pottery, woven baskets, mud cloth throws and so forth. And so it was when I lived in Abuja, I had decorated my house in exactly this style. One day, I invited one of my friends from the office round for lunch. When she entered my house she looked around for a long time and then said to me ‘I love the way you have decorated your house, it looks so beautiful. But if we (Nigerians) do the same, people will say we are bush’. I was gob smacked when I heard this. Why would anyone consider you ‘bush’ for appreciating your own arts/crafts and having them on display in your home? I have never been able to understand this line of thinking.

I have also had my Nigerian friends tell me that I am able to get away with stuff that other Nigerians won’t be able to because ‘ah-ah, you are Oyinbo now’. What??? We have been friends since birth and you still consider me as being ‘Oyinbo’? Oh, and the mother of a guy I once dated told him straight off as soon as she saw me ‘Ah, me I don’t want any Oyinbo grandchildren O!’ Needless to say, that relationship was doomed from the start.

I could go on and on about the way some Nigerians view mixed race people – like the woman onboard the flight back from Nigeria to the UK earlier this year who declared to an inter-racial married couple who were having a bit of a problem getting their child to behave, ‘Eh, that’s how all these half caste children behave. They are uncontrollable. No home upbringing’. You know how your hand begins to itch when you want to just reach across and slap someone? If that wasn’t the height of ignorance, I don’t know what is.

And the thing is I never really consider what I am – it’s a non-issue for me. When asked, I always say I am Nigerian- whether I am being asked the question by a Caucasian or a fellow Nigerian. Only if they venture to question further, do I admit that my mother is white. Not because I don’t embrace my ‘white side’ but it’s just that I feel myself more Nigerian than anything else. But I realise that my being mixed race is an issue for some (hopefully a minority) Nigerians and I guess my inquiring mind wants to know…

If you are mixed race, have you experienced similar situations where you feel you have to ‘prove’ yourself Nigerian? And even then, do you feel that you are not quite accepted as being one?

And if you are a Nigerian, you do think mixed race Nigerians are not ‘authentic’ Nigerians? Do you think mixed race Nigerians are promiscuous and wild (oh yes, I have heard this said loads of times). Or do you think that we ‘to-do’ (heard this one as well)?

Keep it clean.

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33 Comments:

Anonymous songreach said...

I have two nieces here in the US who are mixed and I patiently wait to gain from this discussion as much as you do.

4:34 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think that people are always looking to pick on little things they can talk about. Your average Nigerian is tribalistic and "beefed" (me inclusive) even if it is not to a great extent. So why do you think that you will be excluded from the "beefing"? LOL!


To answer your questions, I've always regarded half-castes as what they are: half this and half that. Promiscuous and wild? I'll say that I have always thought them to have a bevy of boys after them. I know that guys like for people to think that they have an Oyibo girlfriend/wife. Besides, a lot of halfcastes I know tend to pick the best features from both parents and are fyne, so the boys no dey gree them rest. Another way of looking at it, is that the parents are usually more liberal than the average naija parents, so while as a child, I was dressed in maxis, my HC counterpart was wearing mini skirts.

Whether una too-do, I don't know o! Never thot of that one before.

Whew!! Loong comment.

4:49 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

quit your belly arching!!!! I'm soooo sick of mixed raced people complain about how bad they have it. We all have it bad, and we just have to remember that we treat others as we like to be treated.

8:03 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

my wife is exactly like you. somewhere down the lineage of her family (she is from asaba) they ended up with a chinese person on their paternal side. her mother is oyinbo from england.so she has slanty eyes. i kid you not.

so this is what happens- we go to naija- she is oyinbo pepper, we go to new york - the hispanics speak spanish to her and the arabs think she is one of them. We go to portugal and they think she is one of them. We go for chinese \ thai meal they take a second look. Here in Uk she is asked (eventually )where she is from.

Meanwhile, me am just a black man no matter where we are. It is not fair.

9:26 pm  
Anonymous d said...

i think mixed race people have tougher more unique situations to face.
mixed race relationhsips also come with their own unique challenges, even though all relationships have problems.

so i disagree with 'anonymous.'

thank you for sharing. it's made me examine my own stereotypes.

and i'm glad that you admit that being a light skinned black girl with straight hair does reveal our own self-hate issues.

but i'm surprised at the ppl who question your nigerianess...there are so many mixed race nigerians...at my sec school in ogun state there were 5...on my street there were 2 mixed race marriages, and their kids were being brought up in nigeria...it's not uncommon. but ppl like to leave their brains in the bin.

ok...maybe i'm not so surprised...nigerians are always trying to revoke someone's nigerian pass for all kinds of absurd reasons.

9:34 pm  
Blogger Kemolala said...

I felt to an extent, you were describing me. As a mixed race (of the yoruba variety)I always tick the black british box myself but if asked, Id say I was nigerian. And as proud as I am to declare my nationality (if only for the shocked exressions I get) sometimes I wonder why I bother. Don't get me wrong...I do get embraced by some people especially when I speak in yoruba and they gleefully declare 'Tiwa ni'(She's ours!)but like you there are more times than I'd like to admit of instances where some people see me and all they see is how they can fleece me of however much I have. Case in point..When I am in Lagos, I'd normally get my cousin who is black to hail me a cab and set the price whilst hiding round a corner and on one occassion, after I got into the cab, the driver was muttering to himself looking very displeased so I asked him what was wrong and he proceded to tell me off for not hailing him myself cos he would have been able to charge me more!
Growing up in lagos, I remember all the kids chants of 'oyinbo pepe'used to infruriate me to no end and often resulted in me crying off to my mum as they made me feel like I so did not belong.
In boarding school, I couldn't afford to get into trouble with my mates as I'd be the easily recognised one so in all i'd say I didn't always have it so easy. I'd probably go as far as saying that in some ways, my color hindered me.
Here in the UK, I get questioned about my ethnicity mostly by asians, portuguese, spanish etc who all think I'm one of them but not so much by white british -I like to think it makes no difference to them - which then beggers the qestion..why should anyone care about my ethnicity?

12:03 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

@songreach: Yes, I'm looking forward to reading what others think.

@in my head:'...I'll say that I have always thought them to have a bevy of boys after them. I know that guys like for people to think that they have an Oyibo girlfriend/wife...' - never looked at it from this angle before. Hmmm.I wonder what difference it makes having people think your wife/girlfriend is Oyinbo.

@anonymous: I am very surprised at your reaction to my post. You have certainly grabbed the wrong end of the stick. I used to feel the same way as you about the Jews and the African-Americans . My attitude was always 'oh, get over it' until I sat down one day and watched a documentary about the Holocust and what the blacks went through (and still go through)in the 50's and 60's in the States. That changed my veiw completely. I fully understand now where they are coming from when they, as you crudely put it, 'belly ache' about their past and their present.

So, anon, read the post for what it is ..., a statement of fact and not a chance to 'belly ache' about my lot. These issues are real for me. Besides I don't believe I ever said anywhere in my post that 'I have it bad'. Discrimination comes in various forms and you'd be very naive to bury your head in the sand and ignore it.

(BTW, I've never quite understood why when people leave rude comments like this they do so under the cover of anonymity. Just a thought)

@Toks-boy: Glad to know I'm not the only one who gets mistaken for being an Oriential or Asian.

@ Kemolala: LOL - yes oh! How could I have forgotten the chants of Oyinbo pepper, if you eat-ee pepper, you go yellow more, more! Oh, how I hated that!! It used to make me so mad, which just made them taunt me even more!!! And I used to do the same thing with the taxi cabs as well!!

9:31 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Growing up in Nigeria, I had one particular friend, I'll never forget. Her name was Chi-Chi and she was mixed race. Everyone considered her beautiful, which she was and when I think back, I think we all treated her different and special despite the fact that she spoke like us and did the same things we did. And the typical insult from the jealous girls at school was oyinbo pepper - and to those of us who hung with her, we were insulted for feeling like we were all that because we hung with the oyinbo pepper and the half caste girl.

It wasn't until I went to school in England that I learned that half caste is such a degrading term to described people of mixed race. I stopped using it, and began to educate myself about everyone's experience. It's amazing what some "edumacation" can open your eyes to. Here in the States for example, I have friends from Jamaica who look Indian and Chinese but when they open their mouth, it's patois through and through and they wholeheartedly claim Jamaica. History is an amazing teacher and learning about how people migrated from one place to the other for various reasons is very interesting. I have simply learned not to judge a book by it's cover. It also helps that I grew up with a cousin who is mixed race so basically, nothing surprises me. Nigerians should be more open-minded and realize that national identity is not necessarily about what you look like on the outside - it's about your experience and what you identify with. I love that you're proud to be Nigerian, especially when you could easily claim to be something else in a time where Nigerians are looked upon so negatively by many.

Sorry for the long post....LOL

2:25 pm  
Anonymous didi said...

i think u r very much Nigerian becos having been an avid reader of ur blog,i have never suspected u to be anything else.i have loads of mixed race cousins so i guess im not full of questions when i see biracial people.

6:38 pm  
Anonymous Gbeborun of Lagos said...

Wow Pilgrimage! Been a religious reader of your blog for a while now and you sound in every bit a Nigerian to me. This proves 1 thing cultural identification should go beyond physical appearance. 1 think that to some extent, we (Nigerians) commit the same wrong we accuse the brits of in the UK. My housemate when i was in the UK is a british born Nigerian that feels funny when the white guys give him a funny stare whenever he says he's british. But now since moving back I have seen two mixed race fellas being addressed as fake Nigerians just because they are almost white.

My verdict - As long as family and loved ones are not mistaken about your identity, any other person's negative opinion should be DISREGARDED

9:36 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Pilgrimage:

I am a half-caste, mulatto, etc., etc. My mother was a black Nigerian and my father is a white American.

Growing up in Benin City, I was teased, sure. I had to get into some fights to prove I wasn't a "softie" (I wrote about it a bit here)

I think it's different for a boy. I didn't have as hard a time as you did; the only thing we little monsters care about is all physical: can you fight, can you run, can you eat or drink anyone else under the table? :-)

Where did you grow up?

10:23 pm  
Anonymous Michael said...

Hi. I really enjoyed reading your post and am so pleased that you gave yourself this opportunity to connect with others who have similar experiences. I have started a blog dedicated to this topic and have recently started a company offering cultural identity based to services, particularly to mixed race foster children. I am based in the UK and this issue is certainly not isolated to Nigeria. I am the 28 year old son of a Jamaican Father and a White English Mother. Having been raised by my mother a great void developed as a result of a pretty much absent black father and with it all the cultural base I needed for balancing how society was ready to judge me based on my appearance. I fought a long and hard battle to understand that the acceptance I strived for from Black people was a pointless battle. As someone who is mixed race you generally accept that all white people and all Black people are never going to accept you. Some will and some won't. The double standards some people have are a joke. I doubt anyone would ever question whether Malcolm X was black. I think personal gain always plays a part in the minds of many people in regards to cultural acceptance as 'one of them'. I no longer strive for acceptance as anything other than 'one of me'.

3:45 am  
Blogger Pilgrimage to Self said...

@ Fred: I grew up in Benin City too!! Hello broda!

@Ms May: Yes, it is unfortunate that many people still use the term Half Caste in Nigeria. It is a very derogatory term (used in the Indian caste system I believe). I am so glad that you took the time to educate yourself (just like I did about the Jews and African Americans). But change happens slowly, but at long as it happens then it's all good.

@ didi and G of Lagos: Thanks for the complement about being avid readers of my blog! And I'm happy I come across as being Nigerian.

@ Michael:I am certain this issue cuts across a wide geographic area, no doubt about it. My older sister is married to a Jamaican and I was surprised to learn when I visited that light skinned people are considered 'better' than their darker skinned Jamaican counterparts. I shall be visiting your blog often. Thanks for stopping by.



(Just to say that the second anonymous comment was left by me. I have no idea why I came up as anonymous. Blogger doing its thing again I suppose.)

7:58 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Would you send me an email address. I would love to talk with you further on this topic. I'm interested in entrepreneurial people who share similar experience to my own.

2:40 pm  
Blogger Soul said...

As far as I am concerned you can define yourself aswhite, black or a mixture of both if you want to. It's one of the advantages to having a mixed heritage.
Anybody who doesn't like it can go whistle.

your features are simply that.. if they are white features, then you 'favour' your mother, embrace it and feel comfortable.
I don't see why you should split your identity. There is no need to.

I'd be perfectly honest, if I was in a queue with you and you were invited to skip the line, I would be pissed off, to the point where I would go to speak to the person who asked you to skip the line, I would point blank say, if there is a genuine reason fine, but if not, then sorry we all skip the line and jostle for it.

I have a few cousins who have mixed heritage and one of them in particular plays it up. But that's largely because of what she heard when she was growing up. She was always told that she was beautiful, even when she did ugly things people rarely told her off.. their reasoning was ..'she is oyinbo' you can't beat her oh, she will die.
With that kind of leeway any decent obnoxious kid would take advantage, and she did.

Yes there is a difficulty when you are of mixed heritage, I presume people are always asking you to chose sides. And that must be the craziest thing ever.

I was born in the UK to Nigerian parents and I've had my Naijaness questioned numerous times by naija people and by british folk especially when I speak.

I used to at first start effecting a naija accent, and say things like 'haba! which one now, blah blah.. in a pidgeon accent... and then you'd see people visibly relax.

But now as an adult.. I can't be bothered to do all that mess.
If you don't think I'm Nigerian because of the way I speak then good for you, watch whilst I saunter past immigration with my green pali at Nnamdi Azikiwe Airport.

8:12 pm  
Blogger Soul said...

oh and the difference it makes re: what people thinki about having an Oyinbo girlfriend is...

People elevate you to the same level as your girlfriend.

If people place a high value in being white and lets face facts due to colonialism many people do..
Then being white bcomes a desirable object. If you can't be it by birht and can't attain it, then you can associate with it. and intermingle with it.

It also works in the opposite direction as well. Where white people find black people desirable to the point of obsession. Any black person those becomes desirable, because in their eyes any black person is better than the average white person.

This works well for people who inherently hate themselves soo much that they can't stand to be around people who look like them. Anything opposite is always better, so white is always right, better, easier, civilised, can do no wrong e.t.c. (and vice versa)

8:22 pm  
Blogger Pilgrimage to Self said...

@ soul: wow, that was really from the soul (excuse the pun :-)) The first part of your comment really made me laugh. I am sure I pissed off quite a few people in the queues but they never said anything, and just to say it's one of the VERY rare occasions where I played up my 'Oyinbo, oh-so-weak' status.

As per the second part of your comment, one thing my hubby always says is 'Black ting good oh!'

9:04 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Soul, you sound like a well balanced huy. It wasn't that simple for me. I think its the issue of not having the influences of both cultures. Yes I knew I could be white and black and both but, I wasn't really sure how to be black. I had no real fram of reference. Its all different noe of course. But a large but of who we become can be affected drastically by these things.

xonbndIts a question of perspectives in many ways.

11:25 pm  
Anonymous angie said...

i think pple that tease mixed pple are only jealous. cos i think being mixed makes u more beautiful than if u were either. i have met pple who think so too. i have a lot of mixed cousins too. my wish as a child (and mayb now..lol) is to marry a mixed huny guy...lol.

8:41 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I always love and adore "Soul", her comments are always exceptional (No pun intended)

PTS...been awhile eh! Neways I would say you could identify with whatever race you want to. The sentiments we Nigerians put up with biracial people, even amongst our culture is to a very large extent.

My first nephew is "biracial". I remember mumsie(his grandma), myself and him go out, people go like "And who is the kid?" She tells them who he is and their attitude changes instantly, all the goodies you could expect are falling his way! Why? Cos he's biracial? "Half-caste" LOL
And dude throws it down in anyway you want, barely speaks yoruba though but curses the hell out of you, dance and do everything Nigerian, yet he's called "Oyinbo" at school, strictly that!

People ask his name, he gives "grandma's", real name David, grandma's Opeoluwa! And ppl still go, I mean whats your real name?

I havent talked with him in a long time, I so want to hear more from him as he's grown up in high school. The prefential treatments, sentiments, rejections(as not being REAL Nigerian), I so want to hear about them all

3:52 pm  
Anonymous bebe said...

Hi,
I am a mixed race Nigerian myself with a Nigerian father and a White mother.

What I have noticed is most of the Nigerian people do not take you serious. They normal just move in their own little click and you ar not really counted as one of them

As growing up in Nigeria this was never problem but since residing in the UK it came more apparent that the pure Nigerian people do not trust you. I do not know the reason for this but they class you different and always tend to shut their mouth especially when they are taliking of all there deals etc.

The nigerian men on the other hand never take you serious as a marriage material in UK because they feel you are differnt. Not because you are worst then their ladies but for the same reason above they prefer to either date a White, Jamican or a pure Nigerian lady hardly a mixed race.

5:43 am  
Anonymous Kemi said...

I think that to some extent, we are all subjected to prejudiced behaviour, just as we sometimes (knowingly or otherwise) display prejudiced behaviour towards others. Both my parents are black Nigerians, from the Yoruba tribe so I am 100% black and very dark-skinned at that. When I was growing up in Lagos, kids would call me "blackie shadow" and believe me, it was rarely used as a term of affection. To make matters worse, I was quite short and I walked with a limp from childhood polio so as you can imagine, I was teased relentlessly. Despite the fact that my parents and family members were very affirming of me, I still grew up with a very poor self-image and it wasnt until my mid-twenties that I started to develop a measure of self confidence. I am now 30 years old, and even though I still have my struggles, I think I can finally say that I am coming into my own with each passing day.

The bottom line is this: teasing, meanness, ignorance & cruelty are a fact of life, regardless of who you are and where you grew up. Very few people escape it. You will be teased and/or interrogated for being too thin, too fat, too short, too tall, too light or too dark, or too whatever... It can sometimes be hurtful but try not to take it personally. Beyond that, I think it's our duty to teach the next generation to be tolerant and accepting of other people's differences. Education & enlightenment are the keys to putting an end to prejudiced behaviour. Ultimately, the buck stops with us.

My two cents. Sorry for the long-winded post:-)

8:36 am  
Blogger TaureanMinx said...

Kids are just mean!

The term half-caste is what is used in Nigeria, I don't think its meant in a bad way. Its not meant as a derogatory term...not like Nigga and Chinko etc..I only realised it was PC when I moved to the UK.

I have mixed race friends and cousins and yes its still surprising to see someone who looks non Nigerian speaking with a Nigerian accent or saying that they are Nigerian... but only for a second, the same way I would look twice at a Chinese person speaking French.

About people asking if you are truly Nigerian...humans have a curious nature. They just want to know. But I guess it does get annoying when you have respond over and over again.

On the flip side, it is annoying when people get preferential treatment based soley on the colour of their skin. It pisses me off as it does a lot of people. I travel the world and I'm a seond class citizen, then I come back to my country in certain places I get treated even worse. The funny thing is that its Nigerians displaying this ignorant ass behaviour.

Anyway back to the point, I don't see why you have to prove yourself to anyone. People come to their own conclusions regardless and are ignorant because they choose to be. From reading your blog, I identified with you as an Edo girl and as a Nigerian. The fact that you are mixed race is just one more thing I know about you..it hasn't changed anything else. All you have to be is yourself, who doesn't like it can buzz off.

Hows the baby in the belly?lol

10:16 am  
Anonymous Lovelyflower said...

This topic can go on and on... and on and on.

Anyway,I remember when I was invited about 10 years ago, to a show featuring Being Mixed Race and the challenges we face, or something like that.

I declined. My reason? That I would love to go on National Television to discuss my achievements; How I have made an impact in this world; How I have added value...

And not to discuss a topic I had no control over. And would probably just moan or gloat or both.

Food for Thought. The people that matter will get to know you for the real you but you've got to know yourself first.

2:38 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

PTS, get my email? Cheers...

8:30 pm  
Blogger Talatu-Carmen said...

Oh!!! is the final part of the "oyinbo pepper song" saying "you go yellow more more"?

I always thought they were saying something about my "yellow mama."

As a little oyinbo girl in a university community, i would get indignant about the songs, but we would sing them too, at home, to make our parent's laugh. My brother would go out and play with the neighborhood boys. If you heard them talking, you could not tell the difference between my brother and his friends.

Me, i would just get snobby and shy and go inside and read Anne of Green Gables, or saunter down the street to our friends with the nigerian father and the german mother to read their old comic books. My friend wrote stories about flying fighter planes in Germany. We would take turns riding our bicycles down university streets, climbing onto the roofs of the lecture halls. Sneaking off campus at the place where the wall was broken down to have picnics by the river. When another girl from the junior staff flats came to the door to invite me to a party, my friend said we couldn't associate with her. In school, i got notes from girls who said I shouldn't be friends with so-and-so--that I shouldn't be a snob.

Our friends called themselves half-castes then.We all said it. It was only when I came to America for college that I realized what a derogatory word it was.

i think my friends are in England now. it's been so long since i've seen them.

2:38 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

awwww...I think u're an authentic Nigerian...don't mind them jare. And plixxxx....I don't think u shd keep trying to PROVE THAT U'RE NIGERIAN...just IGNORE...

3:10 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

BTW I love what Michael said, I don't think they will ever be any time in ur life where 100% of Nigerians will accept u or 100% of whites will accept u. But who cares about them? As far as u know who u are...abeg, its their problem. They must be very jobless if they want to concern themselves about ur ethnicity. You're Nigerian by LAW, and thats enough.

3:15 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

In the first post, I meant to say that u shd NOT keep trying to prove u're Nigerian...na wa oh, three posts...I must have really loved ur blog!

3:20 am  
Blogger culturalmiscellany said...

My main thought with all this is how your parents must feel. I am in a mixed-race relationship and it is something that concerns me - how would I make my child comfortable with themself. I love my partner and I want any child I have to feel that love in their identity. I don't think anyone would choose to give a child a disadvantage or make them stand out but as Kemi said whatever you are like you will get teased. I wonder how your parents feel about you favouring one identity over the other. If you think about it from their perspective it takes a great about of self-confidence to bring up children in another culture if it goes against their identity. Perhaps I am not making sense?

5:28 pm  
Blogger Uzezi said...

God! When will I finally get a fill of you and your blog! I am becoming addicted and you write very well, and very expressingly too.
I feel what you are saying, and truth is, while some 'full bloods' envy the 'mixed' i think the 'full bloods' should be thankful for the hidrances and problems they don't have. History is such an interesting thing and people should learn more, before opening their mouths to say untrue and superstitous stuffs about the mixed, so all can live in peace. Why deprive a marriage becasue one is not of 'full blood'.
This whole thing and attitude sucks. We were all created by one God. Meanwhile, I like the way you and others who commented here, proudly uphold your Nigerianess. This country is blessed.

4:31 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

give us a fucking break? who gives a flying f**k what ethnicity you are? It is fake a** b*tches like you who don't want the rest of the world to forget that they are not full black.

4:47 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This is to the ignorant anonymous writer who just put that very annoying and unecessary comment up... You are very rude and silly, and if u really thought you truly had something to say, won't it be nicer if you didnt appear anonymous. You are a coward and a very small person... please get a life and stop being such a prat on the www... geez
I don't think PTS should bother commenting on this person's post, as its not worth it.

I have a nephew and a niece that are mixed race, and even though they are 11 and 7 respectively they already know what it is to be 'different'... and they don't even live in Nigeria...

2:11 am  

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